~ Beautifully Sculpted ~
Adapting and birthing life
Joys and sorrows breath
Today was an awkward day for me, and I recall a common thought people always say now and then. You never know what another is going through so try and be kind and thoughtful of how you interact with them. Last night before falling asleep I missed a call from a family member. I immediately tried to call back once I saw this roughly an hour later. There was no answer, so I went to sleep thinking ok I can call back tomorrow. Since it was only the one call it’s not major, I think. I woke today to a message on my phone from another family member saying to call a sibling soon as possible. So, before I fully woke up, I called, and we had a chat. I learned that yesterday our sibling had jumped off a bridge into the waters below, that they’ve driven over several times in the past. I share this to be open on my blog and to reach the person that needs it. I will try to keep it simple and respectful.
Our sibling had a great day from what was told to me, and only in an instant something hit hard, I can only guess pains, depression and the parts of us from inside that can really and instantly cause havoc in our lives. A kind of inner chaos that can take a seemingly happy person and cause them to park their car on a bridge and abruptly hop over the edge without the ability to really focus on positives in their lives. I know this pain, and I’ve danced this dance as well, I live a world away but wish I could hug them right now. I wish I could be there to let them know you will get past this. But there is a period of waiting as they undergo all the necessary recuperation with doctors and the like. They survived the fall with some internal injuries from the limited info I have currently. The pain the darkness that people can feel is so real and seldom palpable to the masses. We live in a world of wars and insensitivity, filters and beautiful this and beautiful that. Tending to ignore the complete picture of our lives and us as a species.
Today I didn’t care I didn’t want to bother with anything, but one thing I love with my logical way of processing things (by no means perfect) is I’m able to almost immediately start formulating on what is the logical outcome to this, what should I do? After calling to check in on other family I know I must let this battle be fought by my sibling. That they will find the strength in us and the rest of their lives to realize how beautifully broken they are. Those breaks that can take the life of us can also fuel us to be stronger for ourselves, our friends, our families and strangers. I can process this information and this day because like nature we grow on in this life. The fruits of our experiences and lives are the fertile soil for the future. I go into this weekend now knowing my sibling will rise stronger in some way shape or form.
It’s never easy and in cases where things hit you spontaneously it can feel impossible. But please reach out to someone anyone. If the person you needed was absent reach out again so your light can continue to shine in a world at times that seems dim. There is help, non-denominational and denominational alike.