It’s never been easy; the battle is never-ending.
The dancing to and fro, bodies twisting and bending.
One composed of energies, extreme volatility.
Ego gives me control, although rather questionably.
You see something in me, where hope seems to flicker.
The empty, icy stare of my eyes as we love or bicker.
My feet are bruised, battered and such.
A dance I know to well and have performed too much.
Why kiss my lips, become lost in my eyes?
Why caress my skin, and curve with my thighs?
Why choose to love one such as me?
Who seems to remain lost incessantly?
So many questions I do ask of you.
Yearning to understand, what it is you hold true.
The void that is me, shines where no light is seen.
Yet you dive into the darkness, what is it you glean?
Next step is made, a swirl, dip and a hop.
Eventually the dance stops and we lamely drop.
Resting together, limbs, and minds, intertwined.
Blood, Sweat, and chemicals, ingredients that bind.
Salt of your flesh, salt of the sea.
Indiscernible for the likes of me.
I feel as though everything, and everyone is the same.
Transferable energies, all playing the same game.
For now, we have the music, and I hope it does not fade.
Songs of us all, never completed, forever frayed.
The process of this work for me was from a place of vulnerability and sensitivity. A reflection of how I reach out and expose enough so the other person knows I have what its called love, respect, desire for them. For me it seems so foreign and the best way I know how to express it at times is through my work. In person the words don’t come, my defenses are up and possibly the scared child inside is trying to scream out and share what I feel. Trying to reach past my own defenses so the other person knows I am all in I will be there, I will be the warrior amazon at your side. Taking up her shield and sword protecting all she loves. While also on rare occasion having her armor destroyed exposing a weakened and wounded being.
I started this creation a while ago from a dream I had it was one where the two individuals were so intertwined that the strands of their muscles would braid together forming one. Knotting and interweaving so beautifully to symbolize oneness. When you literally feel and sense all of the other person, you breath them. The actual title of this piece “Breath” It’s not easy for me and never has been to share, I just don’t, I remain to this day a kind of vault where it seems others have no issue confiding in me everything under the sun. Knowing I’ll keep it safe and locked away. I like that this happens as it shows I am open and inviting and not as robotic as I feel at times. What I fail at is expressing my own suffering vocally to others. It’s not something I do, I perpetrate the strength one who will not be broken, in effect breaking myself. All the while knowing weakness is not in being vulnerable, it is for me never allowing myself to exist there. KKF